Chapter 39
The first thing I registered was warmth–soft sheets, a pillow beneath my head, and the faint scent of lavender lingering in the air that made me instantly recognize the space as my room. My eyelids fluttered, the exhaustion still pressed down on me, but the dull ache in my body was a reminder that I was alive. Barely.
The second thing I registered was that I wasn’t alone.
Low voices murmured in the room, hushed but urgent. My mind struggled to piece together what had happened. The fight. The pain. The darkness that had swallowed me whole.
And then–I remembered,
I shifted slightly, sucking in a sharp breath as pain flared along my ribs. The voices stopped instantly.
A warm hand cupped my cheek, fingers feather–light against my skin, like he was afraid I’d disappear. “Jiselle.”
I knew that voice before I even opened my eyes.
Nate
My lashes lifted, and the moment our gazes met, something inside me twisted painfully. His eyes were dark, worried, searching mine like he needed to see that I was okay with his own two eyes. He looked… tired. And when I realized just how close he was, my heart stuttered in my chest.
I should have been thinking about Max.
But for some reason, all I could think about was him.
I opened my mouth, but before I could say anything, another voice cut through the tension.
“Oh, finally. I was beginning to think you died.”
I turned my head, my stomach dropping slightly when I saw Emari,
My lips parted, horror sweeping over me as I realized something else–I was clean,
swallowed, suddenly dreading the answer to the question forming in my mind.
dressed in fresh clothes. I
As if reading my thoughts, Emari rolled her eyes. “Relax, princess. I dressed you, not your little knight in shining armor over there.”
That… somehow didn’t make me feel any better.
I
I sat up too fast, pain slicing through my ribs. I winced, gritting my teeth as I pressed a hand to my side. Nate’s brows furrowed, his fingers ghosting over my arm as if he wanted to steady me but wasn’t sure if he should.
I could tell that I was already healing–far too fast if you asked me, just like the day Emari broke my rib. But the pain was still there
“Where’s Eva?” I rasped, my throat dry.
“She’s still in her challenge, Ermari answered, inspecting her nails like she didn’t have a care in the world. “You haven’t been out for that long. Just a about an hour.”
I exhaled in relief, but as my eyes flickered between the two of them–Nate at my bedside, Emari standing near the door- couldn’t stop the bitter taste that formed at the back of my throat.
They had history together–sexual history.
I knew that shouldn’t have mattered. I had been with Max. I was with Max.
But it did. It really, really did.
Before I could even finish the thought, Nate’s voice cut through the silence.
“Nothing happened, Jiselle.”
I snapped my gaze back to him. My heart lurched at the guilt in his eyes, like he could read my mind, like he knew exactly what I had been thinking. Or maybe it was written all over my face. I was always terrible at suppressing my reactions “So why is she here?” I asked, hating the way my voice betrayed me
Successfully unlocked!
Emari snorted. “Don’t think I did anything because I cared. You could have died for all I cared, but this caveman of a man draghed me in here to unlock the door,”
u can leave.”
Nate’s jaw clenched, irritation flashing in his eyes. “Which I appreciated. Now you She scoffed. “This is my room-
Chapter 39
“Leave.”
He cut her off sharply, and for once, she listened
With a dramatic eye roll, she strutted out, muttering something under her breath before the door clicked shut behind her.
Silence settled between us, heavy and charged.
“She’s so damn annoying, Nate grumbled, rubbing a hand down his face.
The words left my mouth before I could stop them. Then how could you have been with her?”
He exhaled sharply, like he had been expecting that. “I wasn’t.”
I blinked. “What?”
His gaze locked onto mine, his expression unreadable
“I never slept with her he whispered so softly that I wouldn’t have heard without my wolf hearing.
Shock rippled through me. My lips parted, but I couldn’t find the words.
“I let you think I did,” he admitted, his voice quieter now. “Because when I saw h
him- His jaw flexed. “When I saw Max come up behind you and hold you like that, I just “He cut himself off, shaking his head.
My heart pounded wildly against my ribs. I didn’t know how to feel.
I thought I had moved past this, past whatever it was that I felt for Nate.
Deep down, I knew the truth.
Yet, I still felt the ace in my chest every time I thought about Max. Again, it seemed like Nate read me like an open book with little or no effort.
“Trouble in paradise?” he asked, his expression shifting slightly.
I narrowed my eyes, irritation flaring. “Like you care.”
His lips twitched, but somehow I could tell his amusement wasn’t because of my pain, or the ‘rubbing it in Max’s face reaction.
“He found out, didn’t he?” Nate asked.
My breath hitched. He meant the mate bond
“He found out about everything.” I sighed. “It wasn’t who I wanted him to
“Would you have told him?”
find out.”
My eyes fell to my lap as I thought about his question. Then, I remembered Max’s words–telling me that I was using him as a placeholder until Nate was ready for me. He didn’t say those exact words, but I knew that’s how I made him feel
Nate took my silence as an answer, as not even I knew if I would’ve told him if he didn’t ask.
“He picked a fight with me last night,” he said softly
My head snapped up. “Nate-”
“It’s fine nothing bad happened. Instructor Havelyn parted it before we killed each other. Yet, not a bruise was on either of them: I would have never known if Nate didn’t tell me.
A pang of guilt twisted in my stomach.
“I’m sorry” I whispered. “It’s all my fault.”
“No it’s not,” he said, smiling softly. “Maximus has always been an ass.”
“So are you!” I mumbled without hesitation and he simply chuckled.
He hesitated a bit before he hashed his next question.
“Do you regret training with me?”
I wanted to say yes. I needed to say yes.
But I couldn’t. Because I didn’t.
I shook my head slowly
Something unreadable flickered in his expression. He exhaled, running a hand through his hair before meeting my gaze again
“Look, I’m not sorry you and that asshole aren’t together anymore,” he admitted. “But I am sorry that you’re hurting. And I would do anything to make you feel better again”
I sucked in a breath.
“Why now?” I whispered. “After all this time, why now? It’s not fair.”
2/0
His lips curled into a sad smile again, his hand reaching out, his fingertips barely brushing my cheek.
“know”
My pulsethrummed as he leaned in, his breath fanning against my forehead before pressing a soft, lingering kiss there.
It burned
I didn’t want this. This was wrong.
I wanted Max…I needed Max
Nate lost his chance and it wasn’t fair to either me or Max that he suddenly wanted me now.
1 cant. “I didn’t finish, but the sadness in his eyes told me he got the message just fine.
“I know,” he repeated softly. “And I’m sorry it took me this long to see the truth.”
He turned away before I could even begin to process it.
My chest ached, something deep and raw coiling in my stomach as I watched him walk toward the door.
My voice stopped him. “What truth?”
He turned slightly, glancing at me over his shoulder.
“That no matter how hard I try.” His lips parted, and for a moment, he looked wrecked. Then, his voice dropped to a whisper. “I can never be happy without you, Jiselle.”
He hesitated, then added, “It’s either you, or nothing.”
And then-
He was gone, leaving me in the mess of my own thoughts.
Leaving me to deal with the fact that his words felt like they had just split me open
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Chapter 40
Chapter 40
I distracted myself with research.
It was the only way to keep from losing my mind.
Every time I caught sight of Max–his broad shoulders disappearing into a crowd, the back of his head as he left a room before I could enter–something sharp twisted inside me. He had completely shut me out. And maybe I deserved it. Still, the dread of everything was suffocating, and I needed answers. About this school. About the things that were happening behind closed doors. About me.
So, when the rest of the academy settled for the night, I pulled on a hoodie over my sleep shirt, stuffed my feet into my warmest socks, and slipped into the hallway, heading straight for the library.
I had ensured I trained extra–long with Eva today. It was a necessary evil, but I needed to tire her out. It was the only way could leave without her realizing and insisting on coming with me. Because she knew I no longer slept in her brother’s
room.
This morning, he had someone deliver the rest of my things, and I knew I lost him then.
But I couldn’t focus on that anymore. I had work to do.
As quietly as possible, I moved through the empty, dark hallways of the Alpha Training Academy. All those years of sneaking around with Nate and Ethan paid off after all.
But I was missing one essential fact. Ethan knew how to sneak around too, because of that exact reason
I barely made it five steps before a voice I knew far too well stopped me cold.
“And where exactly are you sneaking off to?”
I spun on my heel, my pulse jumping to my throat. Ethan stood a few feet away, arms crossed, one eyebrow raised in suspicion
I exhaled sharply. Damn it.
“You scared the shit out of me, I hissed, pressing a hand to my chest. “What are you even doing here?”
Ethan stepped closer, his green eyes flicking over my expression like he was trying to read my mind. He always had a bad habit of doing that.
“I was on my way to check on you after Night Nav,” he admitted, voice low. “I figured you’d still be awake. But I saw you sneaking out and I followed you.” His gaze drifted toward the direction I had been heading, and he frowned. “At first I just thought you needed some fresh air. But you’re not heading anywhere near outside, so where are you going?”
I bit the inside of my cheek. Shit.
“Nowhere,” I said too quickly. But it was useless. Ethan knew me far too well.
Ethan gave me a look. “Try again.”
I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose. “Ethan, I need to do this alone-”
“Not happening, he cut in smoothly. “You’re sneaking around in the middle of the night at this godforsaken school I’m coming.”
“Ethan, it’s dangerous, I groaned as I dragged my hands over my hair.
He smirked. “That’s why you need me.”
I groaned again, dragging a hand down my face. Stubborn asshole.
“Fine, I muttered. “But if we get caught, we’re just looking for a book for a class. Got it?”
Ethan nodded, looking too damn pleased with himself as he fell into step beside me.
“So,” he said after a beat, “what exactly are we looking for?”
I exhaled slowly, gripping the sleeves of my hoodie. “I don’t know yet”
Ethan shot me a sidelong glance “That’s not vague or concerning at all
I ignored hirm
The school has secrets
Successfully unlocked!
I had spent weeks trying to piece together the clues–the cryptic warnings from Max, the terrifying reality of Bastian’s words, the fact that I somehow had abilities I shouldn’t have. So did Max and Nate.
And now? I was done waiting for someone to tell me the truth. I was finding it myself.
“The school and our history,” was all I said. It was all I could say without putting his life at risk.
